I guess we’ve all had those late nights about our ex and hopes that they come back not only in our dreams.
1. All contact is cut off.
Usually if the breakup was bad (and even sometimes during an amicable split), there will be a NO CONTACT rule. This is probably for the best if both parties are looking to move on, but it also means that the door is closed. If your ex proposed cutting off contact after your break, it probably means that they have no intention whatsoever of coming back to you and you should respect that.
2. The last fight was really messy.
Sometimes, if the last fight you and your ex had was really bad, there’s just no recovery for a relationship. This could range from shouting to name calling to items being thrown. Usually, if a relationship ends on a note like this your ex isn’t going to be looking to repeat that type of upset and pain.
3. They’re dating other people.
Whether your ex is dating multiple people casually or one person seriously, it’s a sign that they have moved on from the relationship and so should you. This doesn’t mean that your relationship wasn’t special or meaningful, just that, that phase of your life is over and it’s time to prepare yourself for what’s next.
4. Mutual friends are telling you to move on.
Usually when two people have been dating for a long time, friend groups become mixed and the lines blur. In an amicable breakup, it may be tough to tell what your ex is thinking. Do they secretly want you back? Are they just being coy? If your mutual friends are telling you to move on, it means that you should. It means that either your ex is telling you through them that to move past the relationship or that your friends know your ex is moving on and want what’s best for you both. Either way they’re just giving you a friendly nudge.
5. They’ve said the words.
This one is pretty simple, but it’s important to say anyway. Sometimes, when we’re hurt in a breakup, we look for signs where there aren’t any. If your ex said in no uncertain terms that your relationship is over and they don’t want to get back together with you, then you should respect their decision. It’s a tough pill to swallow, but sometimes there aren’t any hints or clues—just the way things are. Respect them and accept it, even if it hurts.
Love can do amazing things to us and so can the loss of it. There is no established rule book about what can and can’t happen after a breakup. I don’t want to rule out miraculous reunions, because they do happen, and these signs will help you figure out if one of those is headed your way. But most of the time, a breakup is a break for good, and even though it’s hard you’ll have to accept it eventually. People can be unpredictable and hurtful, but also beautiful and loving. It’s this inconsistency that when love works makes it feel so much like magic. It’s maddening to lose something special, but that’s how it is sometimes. I hope you find the magic for keeps either with this one or the next one.
