Habits Of Pushovers

Habits of pushovers?

Before you learn how not to be a pushover, it’s important to self-reflect. You need to recognize the common habits that could be causing you to feel emotionally weak.

Being weak is part of what makes you behave like a pushover. So, here are the most common traits of pushovers – does this sound like you?

1. A pushover has low confidence and self-esteem

People with low confidence and low self esteem are most likely to become pushovers.

Due to their inability to assert what they want and their self-perceived weakness, they are easily swayed. They’re always bullied by other people who have stronger personalities than theirs.

2. They are pathological people-pleasers

On the other side of the pushover spectrum, we have people-pleasers. These are pushovers who place so much value in pleasing others, that they always put them first. They’ll do what other people want, even if it’s at their own expense.

These people find it hard to disagree with others, even if they’re visibly uncomfortable with what’s being asked of them. In their mind, the only way to get people’s approval is to do exactly what they want.

3. A pushover places too much value on what people think of them

Some people become pushovers because they are overly concerned about what people think about them.

Like a people-pleaser, they think others will look down on them if they object or disagree. Still, in this frame of mind, they become pushovers just to protect other people’s image of them.

Their entire self-worth is based on other people’s approval. If everybody doesn’t seem to like them, they’ll feel less valuable as an individual.

4. They are timid and avoid confrontation

Some people are so afraid of confrontation that they’ll allow stronger characters to push them around. It’s much easier—and much less drama—not to stand up for themselves.

For them, doing what other people want is easier because it doesn’t create conflicts for them to resolve. And it’s much harder to resolve conflict if you can’t bear upsetting people.

5. A pushover has a hard time saying “no” to people

Pushovers often have a hard time saying no to people. They may be afraid of disappointing others or of being seen as selfish.

They may also feel like they need to please everyone in order to be liked. This can lead them to overextend themselves and take on too much, which can be both stressful and overwhelming.

6. They say “sorry” all the time—for no real reason

Pushovers often say “sorry” all the time, even when they don’t need to. This is because they’re afraid of upsetting others or of being seen as rude. They may also feel like they need to apologize for their own existence or for taking up space.

If they have low self-esteem, as pushovers often do, they may feel that they don’t deserve to take up space. So, they’ll happily let others speak over them. They’ll even apologize to you for interrupting them!

7. Pushovers don’t speak up or give their opinion

Learning to speak up for yourself is an important part of being assertive. It can help you to protect your time and energy, and it can help you to build healthy relationships. If you never give your opinion, how can anyone know what you actually want?

Pushovers never give their opinion. As a result, nobody knows what they want, feel, or even think about anything.

If you can’t imagine what somebody would think about something, it could be because they’re a pushover. They never share enough about themselves because they’re afraid to speak up.

8. They only give completely positive feedback

Got a new outfit? They love it. Changed your hairstyle? They’re crazy about it. Made a life-changing decision that’s definitely, totally a terrible idea?

They think it’s nothing but a good thing. Pushovers hate to rock the boat, so they only ever give positive feedback.

They’re constantly seeking approval and don’t want to offend by being honest. However, this often makes them come across as fake, or worse, ass-kissers.

9. Pushovers take their self-deprecating jokes too far

Everybody should be able to laugh at themselves. However, pushovers take it too far. They’re constantly making self-deprecating jokes, and some are so scathing that they make others uncomfortable. For them, humor is just an excuse to beat on themselves.

After a while, those around them are only laughing out of guilt, or worse, laughing at them for being so pathetic.

About the Author

A prolific love author who specializes in creating love stories often focused on the romantic connections between people which readers can identify with.