Your Husband Hurts Your Feelings? Potential Reasons Why He Does(2023)


Discussing feelings is a natural and necessary part of any relationship, particularly within a marriage.

However, it can become an uphill battle when your husband reacts with anger to your expression of hurt.

But why does this happen?

Here are some potential reasons:

Automatic Defensiveness

Your husband may perceive your expression of hurt as an accusation, prompting a defensive reaction. This defensiveness is often an instinctive response to perceived criticism, even when none is intended.

Lack of Emotional Literacy

Sometimes, he may lack the skills or vocabulary to express his feelings appropriately. This can result in annoyance as a default response to the discomfort caused by unexpressed emotions.

Fear of Vulnerability

Fear can be a powerful driver of anger. He may be afraid of the emotional exposure that comes with acknowledging and addressing your feelings, leading to an angry response. He wants to deflect attention from himself back to you.

Feeling Blamed

It’s possible that your husband is not fully understanding your intention when you share your feelings. He might interpret it as blame rather than an expression of your emotional state, causing him to react angrily. He may assume that if you feel hurt by him, you view him as the “bad guy.”

Stress and External Factors

External stressors or underlying issues can also trigger anger. If your husband is under stress, he might react negatively to additional emotional input. He pushed you away with outrage because he’s already flooded.

Understanding these reasons is the first step in addressing this recurring pattern and creating healthier communication in your relationship.

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