Dear Love Doctor,
Please Sir, how do I cope with a dirty, stingy, talkative husband?
This thing is really irritating me, not that he doesn’t bathe, he does but to change his underwear is a problem, to buy a new underwear is a problem.
I used to buy pants for him when I had the money but they all faded away because he wore them so dirty that they changed colour.
The toothbrush I bought for him last September is what he is still using till date.
I stopped washing his clothes when I was 7 months pregnant, because I couldn’t stress myself because the previous pregnancy was through CS which was as a result of stress.
I recently put to bed for which I am still in bed nursing, yet my husband’s clothes are still packed in one place.
He will just wash one or two and spread it on the bedroom’s door at night and wear it the next day.
We have been living with his parents for good 8 years and have never contributed a dime for feeding.
Even, I don’t buy anything for myself, the majority of the things I use are gifts from people.
We live in a room with our three kids.
Just yesterday, we had a misunderstanding because I seized his brush, telling him to go buy a new one. I told him that I have used that one to brush my hair, yet he didn’t listen, he still used it to brush his teeth.
I had to discard the brush out of annoyance and today, he refused to go to work because he didn’t see the brush.
I asked him to buy a new one for ₦100 in a provision store and he refused. His boss called to know why he was absent, he went ahead to accuse me for his absenteeism.
My husband will wear only his clothes without underwear because he didn’t wash any of the dirty ones. I will sometimes find it fun and start laughing and he’ll admit that he is not ashamed.
Living in their family house is enough hell. I have told his parents several times that I’m tired of the marriage. Most times, my mother inlaw will kneel down to plead and my husband will just sit and busy himself with either his phone or the TV.
All his anger is because I gave birth to only girls. I have nobody to help me and hold my baby, my parents are late. He hardly provides anything beyond ₦1,000. All the bills are being footed by his parents and sometimes, sister.
I have decided to walk away but to save money is a problem because I am not earning.
What do you advise I do?
I desperately want to leave this thing called marriage because I am tired.