Help! My Husband Has Turned Me Into a Punching Bag

Dear Love Doctor,

My marriage is 8 years with three kids; all girls.

It has been from one beating to the other.

My husband is the type of person who would calculate whatever he buys for the family, he will tell you that bread cost him 800.

He doesn’t care if I wear clothes or pants or anything, he doesn’t care about anything that concerns me, he doesn’t know if my girls wear clothes or shoes or anything.

It happens that anything I do is a problem.

One day towards the end of 2016, while was pregnant with my second daughter. Where we lived had a filled up soak away, so I told my husband to call the care taker to come and fix it for us. He said I shouldn’t worry, that we’ll be managing the bush.

One day, I happened to be at home when the care taker came and I told him how we were suffering, and he told me that it will be fix when next he arrives.

When my husband came back, I told him about my discussion with the caretaker and he got angry, shouting because didn’t he tell me to go and talk to him, that I’m a use less idiot and that he will beat me to death if I didn’t take my time.

I simply told him that it hasn’t gotten to the level of beating and killing.

He then went ahead to beat the hell out of me, he kicked me severally and I shielded my belly so that I don’t die.


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I decided to keep it to myself as I couldn’t tell my mum or any of my siblings.

As time progresses, it continues.

When I gave birth to my second daughter, my mom refused to come.

I begged my mum and my siblings but they refused however, due to the heart of a mother, she later agreed.

Then, there was nothing for me to eat so she came with a lot of yam and fish.

My husband wasn’t happy because he didn’t want to have anything to do with my family.

Later, my husband brought in a boy saying that the boy was his co-teacher son and I told him that I didn’t want the boy in my house because of some observations I made about him.

He hated work and every time, my daughter would fondly climb on his body — you know children, all his body will rise.

I kept telling him to send the boy home but husband refused saying that if he needed someone to leave his house, it would be my miserable mother.


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I was shocked.

That night, he beat me so badly, my baby was barely a month old.

I was in severe pains while my mum tried to calm him down.  This man went ahead to hit my Mom on her back and when I reported to his family they said that their brother would never do such.

Even, he told me himself told me that his family would never believe me.

That day, my Mom cried and I was in so much pain.

Two years after that, my Mom passed.

In 2019, he beat me up again and sent me back to my people. They informed him that none of their daughters has ever been received if they came back and as such, that they will never accept me.

He was happy, after the beating and everything I went back to him and he told me that if he killed me, nobody will ever ask about me because I didn’t have anybody.

He started picking offense over nothing.

Going further, the man I took as my father gave him serious warning never to lay his hands on me no matter what and he accepted.

He even got very offended that I went to report him to my brother.

I was happy thinking that was over not on till this year he started again.

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