Sometimes, this could be in hurtful comments you’ve made. Other times, it might be working too late on a day your wife really needed you at home or forgetting an important anniversary. It could also be that she discovered your porn habit or addiction. Whatever it is, when you screw up as a husband, there are some things you need to do right away to make it up to her. Here are the first 3 things to do when you’ve been a bad husband.
1. Stop your bad behavior.
Whatever you’re doing that hurts your wife, the first thing you need to do is stop. Don’t continue doing something you know harms your wife or marriage. If you’ve become a workaholic, change things and bring your life into right order. Use alarms and reminders to make sure you don’t forget when you’re needed at home (and why). If you haven’t taken her on a date in a while, take her out for a coffee or an ice cream as soon as possible.
2. Own it.
This is where the belief that “boys will be boys” is often used to dismiss unacceptable behaviors. Don’t do this. When you realize you’ve hurt your wife, don’t make excuses, minimize your actions, or project the blame on someone else. You screwed up, so you need to take responsibility and accept whatever consequences might be coming for your actions.
3. Apologize for what you’ve done.
This may seem like the hardest thing to do because it’s humiliating to admit you’ve done something wrong. You’ve got to swallow your pride, assume a position of accountability, and say the words “I’m sorry.” Depending on what’s happened, you might need to say you’re sorry more than once as the hurt could go very deep.